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Christmas presents under the tree

Ahh... School is out and your kids have two weeks for fun, relaxation, getting bored, fighting with each other and spending up to 100 hours on some kind of screen. Sounds like a wonderful 'break'! Especially because that last one - which creates crankier offspring - is the default solution for many kids these days.

Fortunately with a little planning - you can help avoid some of the vacation pitfalls and all have a better time for your efforts. Here is a list of 10 things (from easier to more planned) that can help:

  1. Have a deck of cards with paper and pen on the kitchen table
  2. Have baking supplies handy - muffin or cookie mix ...continue reading →

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Electronic_Family_Xmas_Card

I know it was a joke. Someone posted one of those Christmas photos showing a dad and three kids all in the same matching jean colored shirts and pants. But in this photo no one is looking at the camera because they are all looking down at some electronic device.

I chuckle for a second until I remember that it's too true to be that funny. There is just something about embracing our weaknesses that bums me out.

But then I remember the good news... ...continue reading →

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5050_AdventureDear Reader,

In case you've been wondering why I haven't posted lately here's what's going on. Without going into detail, this year has had a few too many setbacks, sadnesses and life stresses. Not all bad of course but just a lot crammed into a short period of time.

Now I am big on living life with purpose but I found that trying to keep it all together was not working. So I went the other route and let a lot of it go.

Fortunately, this has made room for me to create my latest, greatest adventure... ...continue reading →

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You_Can_Do_ItIf you think you can or you think you can't, you're probably right. ~ Henry Ford

The 'I Can't' mindset is something I come across often. Sometimes it's from my children when I asked them to get up for school or my husband when he doesn't find time to exercise. Sometimes it's from a discouraged client who can't get behind his or her own goals. And sometimes it's from my own mind focusing on all the problems, all the reasons why not, all the barriers to success.

When I was considering going back to grad school at age 38, there were plenty of reasons why that was a bad idea. I'm too old. The kids are too young. It will be too hard. I don't have the money. Fortunately I worked through those obstacles because had I let them guide me, I would not have gotten that degree. And I would not be doing the work I love today. ...continue reading →

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iStockvideogaming

So your child REALLY likes video games. So if left alone, they would play 3, 4, 5 or more hours non-stop. So they resist your attempts to limit their time playing these games or sneak in extra time whenever possible. So you catch them lying or staying up late to play more and being irritable, angry or stuck in a moping mood when not able to play.

At what point do you wonder if this is normal or if it seems more like the signs of a video game junkie?

Part 1: Is Gaming Addiction Real?

A 2008 study from Stanford School of Medicine on video/on-line game playing and the brain found that male participants (more so than female participants) showed activation in the region of the brain associated with reward and addiction. Even many gamers will admit this. In fact according to a survey of over 40,000 gamers "about 50% of MMORPG (Massive-Multi-player Online Role Play Game) players would consider themselves addicted to the game." ...continue reading →

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Catching your child in a lie can be a troubling experience. Fear of moral weakness, anger at being manipulated or even hurt by a sense of betrayal, parents can react pretty strongly to these transgressions.

But it is important to remember both that it's a rare person who hasn't dabbled in dishonesty and that there's a big gap between telling a lie and being a pathological liar.

How we respond to our children's lying can make a difference in whether this is a stage or a profession. So before you get out that bar of soap or the tabasco sauce, it might help to understand the purpose and development of lying. ...continue reading →

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GoToSleepGo The Fuck To Sleep is a new book written by Adam Mansbach about a tired parent's frustration at his child's inability to go to sleep. Written like a children's book - but definitely not one - it mimics the rhyming cuplet style of the sleepytime genre only with a twist.

The story highlights much of the 11th hour drama that parents with young kids can relate to. Negotiating the number of books read, glasses of water drunk, and, not surprisingly, just how many trips to the bathroom need to be taken, it offers two sweet lines of text, followed by two exacerbated lines finishing with the book's catchy signature phrase.

The book appears to be doing well and the author is making the rounds to media outlets. But there's something about a book that jokes about being SO frustrated with your child that you would repeatly tell them to 'Go the fuck to sleep' - if only in your head - that has me going against the 'this book had me ROTFLMAO' crowd and give it a thumbs down. ...continue reading →

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Husband_Blames_Wife

Dear Annie,

I have an arranged marriage that is having problems. When my husband and I talk, he makes issues out of everthing I say. Also he never supports me with my mother-in-law who seems to look for that moment when she can create a misunderstanding between us.

I have a baby and my husband threatens divorce. Then calls up my parents every other day complaining. What can I do to make this better? ~ Worried and Discouraged

Dear Worried,

I am sorry that you and your husband are having so much trouble. I imagine that neither of you expected your marriage to be this way. And adding an un-supportive mother-in-law into the mix makes it that much harder to create a marriage where you and your husband feel like you are on the same side. ...continue reading →